The Pent Umbrage of the Tempy, Part VI
You noticed your best friend wasn’t picking up paychecks (you work in payroll—you’re the boss there) and then you tracked back to discover your best friend wasn’t submitting time sheets, either. You spent a few mornings outside the mail room, where your best friend worked for thirteen years, looking to see if your best friend was coming to work—you observed your best friend was not (coming or going).
Your best friend never knew if your best friend was coming or going, but you always did. Now, your best friend doesn't appear to be coming OR going.
You had observed your best friend for many years. Never from up close—No, No, No. Your best friend probably does not know you are a friend. Your best friend may not even know you exist. (You've never met or been introduced.) That doesn’t matter to you. Or the friendship. You know that you are your friend’s friend—and that’s the only thing that counts (counts,matters, signifies, means, or is observable.)
You don’t need to behave as a friend in order to be a friend—your friend understands that. That’s why you are friends with this friend—it is one of the reasons, anyway. There are, of course, many other reasons. You don’t have time to list all of them—there are that many. You don't need to enumerate how your best friend, unaware even of your existence, could possibly understand anything about you.
You don’t need to ask your friend what your best friend does or does not understand. The friendship is that good. It’s even better, you know from bitter experience, to know without asking. Asking only complicates things—and what if, after asking, you discover you disagree with your best friend? That means the friendship is over—and that’s devastating.
Where is your best friend? Why do you need to know that? Wherever your friend is, your best friend is your friend. And yet it would be reassuring to get a signal of your friend’s –if not intimacy, then proximity (understood as a GPS coordinate.) If your best friend was no longer living, you only then might you need to modify your feelings(for your friend.)